[ She definitely has. Elizabeth is tired of all this dancing fruit nonsense and refuses to open her fridge. Luckily, no packages addressed to Jade had arrived today.
She's just finishing getting dressed and Jade's knock catches her attention. ]
It's clear, sweetie. [ Literally, like she's entering a warzone. Bigby was probably already gone — be it for his own need for space or just for work. ] If you have one of those things in your hands, toss them down the garbage disposal.
Noooo! I do not. [ which is seen to be true as she slides in, back to the door as she closes it again. jade regards her mother with a curious gaze, brows lifted but her lips pursed in a tight line. ]
Mr. Dawes told me to check up on you.
[ which maaaybe liz has seen on her phone, she doesn't know. jade hasn't heard anything about the glassing or some such before now, so. there's a sort of thoughtfulness to her words. ]
[ She freezes when 'Mr. Dawes' is uttered by Jade. That's a sour subject and luckily, Jade can't see her nose scrunch up.
FUCKING JACK...
Maybe it's his own passive aggressive payback or knowing their note conversations, Elizabeth's guilt with keeping her secret. ]
Mr. Dawes is probably starting his day snuggling a bottle of Jose Cuervo. [ There's an awkward laugh as she sits down on the edge of the bed, her purse already packed with her canvas bag for the day. ] I'm fine.
[ The wash of disappointment becomes apparent on her face. Her eyes soften and she looks down at her hands. There's a noticeable lack of eye contact. ]
I want you to talk to your Dad after this. [ She sounds almost sympathetic at this point. ] Anything that you've been remembering, like with Dave, he should know about it.
[ She's flipping the table on Jade seemingly, but she stops, rubbing her thumb against her opposite hand's knuckles. ]
I didn't tell him about something that happened to me. Something... something like those moments you told me about. But, it was different. I didn't tell either of you.
[ there's a beat. jade looks surprised, then her expression changes, melting away into a simple but earnest understanding. yeah, she's kind of in agreement here. ] I think.... hiding it is the wrong thing to do for all of us. We don't have anyone else to confide in, so we have to learn to talk about it. I'll talk to Dad. I wanted his opinion on something anyway.
[ i.e.: how do you think dave ended up full of bullet holes lol ]
Good. Keep him in the loop, more so than Dave or anyone else. He may not have answers, but he's here.
[ She's preaching a belief different than her own. It makes her think of her own father and that sinking disappointment in herself nearly makes her lip tremble. What's the point in trying to lead others if you're not following your own beliefs? ]
Along those lines, yes. [ Elizabeth overheard the conversations about Dave's eyes — it's hard not to hear any phone convos or private convos in the room across from them. It goes both ways. ] Come here. Sit on the bed with me.
[ She shrugs her shoulders a bit uncomfortably, working her sweater down her back only a bit. Jade could easily see what's hidden. ]
[ jade's quiet the whole time, nodding only once to show she's listening. the bright blue eyes she's inherited are attentive and curious, even as she sits next to elizabeth. the sweater is shimmied down, and jade purses her lips further as she observes the scar.
she wants to cover it up, start a healing process but it looks like it's healing, already, maybe even just about done turning into a scar. ]
It looks painful.
[ remorse. regret. she let this go on for how long? how long has elizabeth had this and jade's been wrapped up in what - a memory? something she can't fix. her mother has been in pain and jade kept her head in the clouds. ]
[ She doesn't want to drag it into some pity party. Elizabeth doesn't remember hurting. She doesn't remember any pain associated with it other than a dull ache that she originally believed was caused from sleeping wrong. ]
I didn't tell your father and we're reaping that consequence. He's been on edge. Untrusted. I've neglected his ability to make things work besides not having all the pieces to the puzzle. [ She truly sounds remorseful. ] I didn't want to bring this to you both until I had answers — knew this wouldn't... spread? I suppose that's the biggest factor.
[ jade doesn't like to hear that there are problems, but she nods. they've handled it before, they can do it anyway. (jade grew up thinking there wasn't a single thing her parents couldn't handle.) ]
Okay. I won't tell anyone.
And... I'll talk to Dad about my stuff, too. I don't, um. Think he can help with that, but. [ jade twiddles her thumbs and stares into the scar intently, brows knitted. ] He's the detective, not me.
[ liz is right about that and in one statement, she nails exactly why she told her mother about the initial memory she had. that said, it reminds her that she has more to tell her about it. ]
I guess I have to tell you both this, but um. That memory, I guess... I got more of it. The one with Dave. [ jade hesitates, raising a hand and standing slowly so that she can reach out to elizabeth. ] Do you want to hear it?
[ inhale, exhale. her hand comes to rest on her chest. her eyes shut closed, and her hand feels warm; not as warm as in her memory, but it makes her think of the recoil. ]
The bullets that killed Dave in my memory were from my gun. I had an assault rifle - and - it was my fault.
[ Jade has to stumble over her words. Elizabeth's hand was idle, clutching at the sheets bundled at the end of the bed beneath her. Her knuckles grow white as her tension rises. ]
That wasn't real.
[ There was no room for doubt in her voice. ]
Whatever — whatever your mind is trying to tell you happened... ignore it. There was no fault because it didn't happen.
[ jade wants to argue the point. she really does - and it's clear in the way there's green fire in her eyes. it's the same way bigby's face betrays his anger, narrowed eyes paired with a sarcastic sort of eyebrow raise. her lips are pursed shut. ]
As not real as the hole in your back.
[ it's more like a puppy biting back in warning, though. ]
[ Elizabeth stands up, tugging her top up a bit higher to cover the mark. Jade's words run cold and she's herself not too keen on how right her girl was. ]
That's different. [ Right? ] Your nightmare isn't real. Dave is still doting around you and — don't. I don't even know why or how this mark appeared. It has nothing to do with a memory.
[ The tension rises a bit, but she's definitely repeating: ]
You're a strong girl, Jade, but the only thing you can do is step forward. If it was a so-called memory, it's in the past.
[ denial isn't just a river in egypt, it's true and blatant in jade's expression. she's going to have a headache later. there's a lot of negativity associated with that memory, and to have it... blotted down, in a way, swept under the rug - she's never been particularly great about expressing herself and jade's always tried to be at least a passable golden girl for her parents, but... ]
I know that, and I do not think you are wrong, but I don't think that-- [ she stops there and her shoulders raise; it's defensive in advance. ] I'm not-- [ she's trying, but jade instead shakes her head and inhales deep. ]
It's a very serious thing to suddenly have tossed at me is all.
[ Elizabeth tries her best. She didn't have a mom who gave her the nurturing that a mother would so she wings it. Most of the time, she's spot on — a counter to Bigby's protective role as 'head of the household'. Yet... she misses the mark here. These things — the mark, the memories — appeared so abruptly and she tries so desperately to make them leave as well. ]
I didn't want to add anything else to your worries. School, those — whatever they are... it's been a very stressful year already. One of the most stressful ones, honestly.
[ She grows a bit silent. ]
...I just don't want you to worry over something we have no answers for. That's why I'm trying to keep the faith that — ..I don't know, we won't wake up any worse for wear.
[ she sighs, but it's an agreement. it's up to elizabeth to decipher if jade's agreeing out of obligation, a desire to get out of the conversation or to mask her own insecurities. teenagers are difficult at best. ]
Worrying or not is not really what I am concerned about. It's - well... the trust aspect, Mom.
[ I smell another talk in the future about this, tbh.
There's a hitch in her throat - like her voice was ready to go before she could even formulate a sentence, but something stopped her. ]
Don't. [ Elizabeth says, softer than the assertiveness she had moments ago. ] I've had enough from your father. I get it. You're both — you both have a right to be angry with me.
[ But they don't get it, she thinks. Elizabeth tries to understand that her and Jade were similar in what they were experiencing but what if the scar was the next step for Jade? A mark, a wound — she didn't need to bring that fear to her. ]
If anything occurs again... I won't keep this to myself. The cold shoulders and disappointment are the last thing any of us needs.
I am not angry. [ bigby has probably said this to her, she realizes, but if there's one thing jade hates more than rude people, it's leaving dirty laundry between her and elizabeth. ] I'm worried, and I am absolutely not going to give you the cold shoulder. That's dumb and I am not dumb like Dad.
[ please note: if there is a bigger daddy's girl in game than jade, we would all like to meet her. that insult has less bite than a pomeranian. ]
I think instead of trying to protect each other, we need to know what is going on, is all. The last thing we need is to be blindsided by something.
[ when jade stands, she puts a hand to her shoulder. ] We are a lot stronger than whatever is happening, right?
[ They both were dumb! Liz and Bigby's dumbness somehow always cancelled each other out, but when they both weren't all in... that's when the problems started. ]
See, sweetie, if we knew what the hell we're trying to protect one another from, then — then that would certainly be more valid!
[ #defensive. ]
But, whatever this whole mess is... we just— we have to face it together.
[ jade grins in that way that makes it clear she's trying to make everything better and maybe not so big and scary; it's the same thing as the obscene amount of exclamation points she uses in texts when she's upset and trying to sweep it under the rug.
so yes, it's dumb and stupid and awful and they're all idiots who care too much and hide things because they think that they're taking care each other. even now, she insists on this, clearly.
but she slips her arms over elizabeth's shoulders and pulls her into a hug before slipping back toward the door. ]
I think we will be ok as long as we do what we can. It's not like we aren't all kiiiiind of intelligent in some way?
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
3/17 during the retrospec post
Hey! Um. Can I come in?
[ she probably learned to do this the hard way?? ]
screams
She's just finishing getting dressed and Jade's knock catches her attention. ]
It's clear, sweetie. [ Literally, like she's entering a warzone. Bigby was probably already gone — be it for his own need for space or just for work. ] If you have one of those things in your hands, toss them down the garbage disposal.
thnx jack
Mr. Dawes told me to check up on you.
[ which maaaybe liz has seen on her phone, she doesn't know. jade hasn't heard anything about the glassing or some such before now, so. there's a sort of thoughtfulness to her words. ]
no subject
FUCKING JACK...
Maybe it's his own passive aggressive payback or knowing their note conversations, Elizabeth's guilt with keeping her secret. ]
Mr. Dawes is probably starting his day snuggling a bottle of Jose Cuervo. [ There's an awkward laugh as she sits down on the edge of the bed, her purse already packed with her canvas bag for the day. ] I'm fine.
no subject
It's kind of unusual for him to insist I check up on you, though? Is something wrong, Mom?
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I want you to talk to your Dad after this. [ She sounds almost sympathetic at this point. ] Anything that you've been remembering, like with Dave, he should know about it.
[ She's flipping the table on Jade seemingly, but she stops, rubbing her thumb against her opposite hand's knuckles. ]
I didn't tell him about something that happened to me. Something... something like those moments you told me about. But, it was different. I didn't tell either of you.
no subject
[ i.e.: how do you think dave ended up full of bullet holes lol ]
...Is it like Dave's eyes?
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[ She's preaching a belief different than her own. It makes her think of her own father and that sinking disappointment in herself nearly makes her lip tremble. What's the point in trying to lead others if you're not following your own beliefs? ]
Along those lines, yes. [ Elizabeth overheard the conversations about Dave's eyes — it's hard not to hear any phone convos or private convos in the room across from them. It goes both ways. ] Come here. Sit on the bed with me.
[ She shrugs her shoulders a bit uncomfortably, working her sweater down her back only a bit. Jade could easily see what's hidden. ]
no subject
she wants to cover it up, start a healing process but it looks like it's healing, already, maybe even just about done turning into a scar. ]
It looks painful.
[ remorse. regret. she let this go on for how long? how long has elizabeth had this and jade's been wrapped up in what - a memory? something she can't fix. her mother has been in pain and jade kept her head in the clouds. ]
Do you want Tylenol?
no subject
[ She doesn't want to drag it into some pity party. Elizabeth doesn't remember hurting. She doesn't remember any pain associated with it other than a dull ache that she originally believed was caused from sleeping wrong. ]
I didn't tell your father and we're reaping that consequence. He's been on edge. Untrusted. I've neglected his ability to make things work besides not having all the pieces to the puzzle. [ She truly sounds remorseful. ] I didn't want to bring this to you both until I had answers — knew this wouldn't... spread? I suppose that's the biggest factor.
no subject
Okay. I won't tell anyone.
And... I'll talk to Dad about my stuff, too. I don't, um. Think he can help with that, but. [ jade twiddles her thumbs and stares into the scar intently, brows knitted. ] He's the detective, not me.
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[ She made that mistake once. ]
Sometimes it's less about having answers and more about having someone there.
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I guess I have to tell you both this, but um. That memory, I guess... I got more of it. The one with Dave. [ jade hesitates, raising a hand and standing slowly so that she can reach out to elizabeth. ] Do you want to hear it?
no subject
...Go on, if you're comfortable.
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The bullets that killed Dave in my memory were from my gun. I had an assault rifle - and - it was my fault.
no subject
That wasn't real.
[ There was no room for doubt in her voice. ]
Whatever — whatever your mind is trying to tell you happened... ignore it. There was no fault because it didn't happen.
no subject
As not real as the hole in your back.
[ it's more like a puppy biting back in warning, though. ]
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That's different. [ Right? ] Your nightmare isn't real. Dave is still doting around you and — don't. I don't even know why or how this mark appeared. It has nothing to do with a memory.
[ The tension rises a bit, but she's definitely repeating: ]
You're a strong girl, Jade, but the only thing you can do is step forward. If it was a so-called memory, it's in the past.
[ Unlike Elizabeth's current denial. ]
no subject
I know that, and I do not think you are wrong, but I don't think that-- [ she stops there and her shoulders raise; it's defensive in advance. ] I'm not-- [ she's trying, but jade instead shakes her head and inhales deep. ]
It's a very serious thing to suddenly have tossed at me is all.
no subject
I didn't want to add anything else to your worries. School, those — whatever they are... it's been a very stressful year already. One of the most stressful ones, honestly.
[ She grows a bit silent. ]
...I just don't want you to worry over something we have no answers for. That's why I'm trying to keep the faith that — ..I don't know, we won't wake up any worse for wear.
no subject
[ she sighs, but it's an agreement. it's up to elizabeth to decipher if jade's agreeing out of obligation, a desire to get out of the conversation or to mask her own insecurities. teenagers are difficult at best. ]
Worrying or not is not really what I am concerned about. It's - well... the trust aspect, Mom.
no subject
There's a hitch in her throat - like her voice was ready to go before she could even formulate a sentence, but something stopped her. ]
Don't. [ Elizabeth says, softer than the assertiveness she had moments ago. ] I've had enough from your father. I get it. You're both — you both have a right to be angry with me.
[ But they don't get it, she thinks. Elizabeth tries to understand that her and Jade were similar in what they were experiencing but what if the scar was the next step for Jade? A mark, a wound — she didn't need to bring that fear to her. ]
If anything occurs again... I won't keep this to myself. The cold shoulders and disappointment are the last thing any of us needs.
no subject
[ please note: if there is a bigger daddy's girl in game than jade, we would all like to meet her. that insult has less bite than a pomeranian. ]
I think instead of trying to protect each other, we need to know what is going on, is all. The last thing we need is to be blindsided by something.
[ when jade stands, she puts a hand to her shoulder. ] We are a lot stronger than whatever is happening, right?
no subject
[ They both were dumb! Liz and Bigby's dumbness somehow always cancelled each other out, but when they both weren't all in... that's when the problems started. ]
See, sweetie, if we knew what the hell we're trying to protect one another from, then — then that would certainly be more valid!
[ #defensive. ]
But, whatever this whole mess is... we just— we have to face it together.
no subject
so yes, it's dumb and stupid and awful and they're all idiots who care too much and hide things because they think that they're taking care each other. even now, she insists on this, clearly.
but she slips her arms over elizabeth's shoulders and pulls her into a hug before slipping back toward the door. ]
I think we will be ok as long as we do what we can. It's not like we aren't all kiiiiind of intelligent in some way?
(no subject)