[ inhale, exhale. her hand comes to rest on her chest. her eyes shut closed, and her hand feels warm; not as warm as in her memory, but it makes her think of the recoil. ]
The bullets that killed Dave in my memory were from my gun. I had an assault rifle - and - it was my fault.
[ Jade has to stumble over her words. Elizabeth's hand was idle, clutching at the sheets bundled at the end of the bed beneath her. Her knuckles grow white as her tension rises. ]
That wasn't real.
[ There was no room for doubt in her voice. ]
Whatever — whatever your mind is trying to tell you happened... ignore it. There was no fault because it didn't happen.
[ jade wants to argue the point. she really does - and it's clear in the way there's green fire in her eyes. it's the same way bigby's face betrays his anger, narrowed eyes paired with a sarcastic sort of eyebrow raise. her lips are pursed shut. ]
As not real as the hole in your back.
[ it's more like a puppy biting back in warning, though. ]
[ Elizabeth stands up, tugging her top up a bit higher to cover the mark. Jade's words run cold and she's herself not too keen on how right her girl was. ]
That's different. [ Right? ] Your nightmare isn't real. Dave is still doting around you and — don't. I don't even know why or how this mark appeared. It has nothing to do with a memory.
[ The tension rises a bit, but she's definitely repeating: ]
You're a strong girl, Jade, but the only thing you can do is step forward. If it was a so-called memory, it's in the past.
[ denial isn't just a river in egypt, it's true and blatant in jade's expression. she's going to have a headache later. there's a lot of negativity associated with that memory, and to have it... blotted down, in a way, swept under the rug - she's never been particularly great about expressing herself and jade's always tried to be at least a passable golden girl for her parents, but... ]
I know that, and I do not think you are wrong, but I don't think that-- [ she stops there and her shoulders raise; it's defensive in advance. ] I'm not-- [ she's trying, but jade instead shakes her head and inhales deep. ]
It's a very serious thing to suddenly have tossed at me is all.
[ Elizabeth tries her best. She didn't have a mom who gave her the nurturing that a mother would so she wings it. Most of the time, she's spot on — a counter to Bigby's protective role as 'head of the household'. Yet... she misses the mark here. These things — the mark, the memories — appeared so abruptly and she tries so desperately to make them leave as well. ]
I didn't want to add anything else to your worries. School, those — whatever they are... it's been a very stressful year already. One of the most stressful ones, honestly.
[ She grows a bit silent. ]
...I just don't want you to worry over something we have no answers for. That's why I'm trying to keep the faith that — ..I don't know, we won't wake up any worse for wear.
[ she sighs, but it's an agreement. it's up to elizabeth to decipher if jade's agreeing out of obligation, a desire to get out of the conversation or to mask her own insecurities. teenagers are difficult at best. ]
Worrying or not is not really what I am concerned about. It's - well... the trust aspect, Mom.
[ I smell another talk in the future about this, tbh.
There's a hitch in her throat - like her voice was ready to go before she could even formulate a sentence, but something stopped her. ]
Don't. [ Elizabeth says, softer than the assertiveness she had moments ago. ] I've had enough from your father. I get it. You're both — you both have a right to be angry with me.
[ But they don't get it, she thinks. Elizabeth tries to understand that her and Jade were similar in what they were experiencing but what if the scar was the next step for Jade? A mark, a wound — she didn't need to bring that fear to her. ]
If anything occurs again... I won't keep this to myself. The cold shoulders and disappointment are the last thing any of us needs.
I am not angry. [ bigby has probably said this to her, she realizes, but if there's one thing jade hates more than rude people, it's leaving dirty laundry between her and elizabeth. ] I'm worried, and I am absolutely not going to give you the cold shoulder. That's dumb and I am not dumb like Dad.
[ please note: if there is a bigger daddy's girl in game than jade, we would all like to meet her. that insult has less bite than a pomeranian. ]
I think instead of trying to protect each other, we need to know what is going on, is all. The last thing we need is to be blindsided by something.
[ when jade stands, she puts a hand to her shoulder. ] We are a lot stronger than whatever is happening, right?
[ They both were dumb! Liz and Bigby's dumbness somehow always cancelled each other out, but when they both weren't all in... that's when the problems started. ]
See, sweetie, if we knew what the hell we're trying to protect one another from, then — then that would certainly be more valid!
[ #defensive. ]
But, whatever this whole mess is... we just— we have to face it together.
[ jade grins in that way that makes it clear she's trying to make everything better and maybe not so big and scary; it's the same thing as the obscene amount of exclamation points she uses in texts when she's upset and trying to sweep it under the rug.
so yes, it's dumb and stupid and awful and they're all idiots who care too much and hide things because they think that they're taking care each other. even now, she insists on this, clearly.
but she slips her arms over elizabeth's shoulders and pulls her into a hug before slipping back toward the door. ]
I think we will be ok as long as we do what we can. It's not like we aren't all kiiiiind of intelligent in some way?
[ That hug was what she needed. Her form sinks a bit. She feels the nerves in every limb of her body go numb. ]
There's no way we're going to let this beat us. Intelligence isn't the only thing, Jade, but it's the undeniable fact Wolfs refuse to roll over for anyone. It's true in the animal kingdom and it's true here. You can thank your father for that one.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
...Go on, if you're comfortable.
no subject
The bullets that killed Dave in my memory were from my gun. I had an assault rifle - and - it was my fault.
no subject
That wasn't real.
[ There was no room for doubt in her voice. ]
Whatever — whatever your mind is trying to tell you happened... ignore it. There was no fault because it didn't happen.
no subject
As not real as the hole in your back.
[ it's more like a puppy biting back in warning, though. ]
no subject
That's different. [ Right? ] Your nightmare isn't real. Dave is still doting around you and — don't. I don't even know why or how this mark appeared. It has nothing to do with a memory.
[ The tension rises a bit, but she's definitely repeating: ]
You're a strong girl, Jade, but the only thing you can do is step forward. If it was a so-called memory, it's in the past.
[ Unlike Elizabeth's current denial. ]
no subject
I know that, and I do not think you are wrong, but I don't think that-- [ she stops there and her shoulders raise; it's defensive in advance. ] I'm not-- [ she's trying, but jade instead shakes her head and inhales deep. ]
It's a very serious thing to suddenly have tossed at me is all.
no subject
I didn't want to add anything else to your worries. School, those — whatever they are... it's been a very stressful year already. One of the most stressful ones, honestly.
[ She grows a bit silent. ]
...I just don't want you to worry over something we have no answers for. That's why I'm trying to keep the faith that — ..I don't know, we won't wake up any worse for wear.
no subject
[ she sighs, but it's an agreement. it's up to elizabeth to decipher if jade's agreeing out of obligation, a desire to get out of the conversation or to mask her own insecurities. teenagers are difficult at best. ]
Worrying or not is not really what I am concerned about. It's - well... the trust aspect, Mom.
no subject
There's a hitch in her throat - like her voice was ready to go before she could even formulate a sentence, but something stopped her. ]
Don't. [ Elizabeth says, softer than the assertiveness she had moments ago. ] I've had enough from your father. I get it. You're both — you both have a right to be angry with me.
[ But they don't get it, she thinks. Elizabeth tries to understand that her and Jade were similar in what they were experiencing but what if the scar was the next step for Jade? A mark, a wound — she didn't need to bring that fear to her. ]
If anything occurs again... I won't keep this to myself. The cold shoulders and disappointment are the last thing any of us needs.
no subject
[ please note: if there is a bigger daddy's girl in game than jade, we would all like to meet her. that insult has less bite than a pomeranian. ]
I think instead of trying to protect each other, we need to know what is going on, is all. The last thing we need is to be blindsided by something.
[ when jade stands, she puts a hand to her shoulder. ] We are a lot stronger than whatever is happening, right?
no subject
[ They both were dumb! Liz and Bigby's dumbness somehow always cancelled each other out, but when they both weren't all in... that's when the problems started. ]
See, sweetie, if we knew what the hell we're trying to protect one another from, then — then that would certainly be more valid!
[ #defensive. ]
But, whatever this whole mess is... we just— we have to face it together.
no subject
so yes, it's dumb and stupid and awful and they're all idiots who care too much and hide things because they think that they're taking care each other. even now, she insists on this, clearly.
but she slips her arms over elizabeth's shoulders and pulls her into a hug before slipping back toward the door. ]
I think we will be ok as long as we do what we can. It's not like we aren't all kiiiiind of intelligent in some way?
no subject
There's no way we're going to let this beat us. Intelligence isn't the only thing, Jade, but it's the undeniable fact Wolfs refuse to roll over for anyone. It's true in the animal kingdom and it's true here. You can thank your father for that one.